Finding Your Roots and Letting Yourself Grow

Some people are easy to understand at first meeting. Ardan would rather leave you with something more honest: himself.

For him, originality isn't about being different for the sake of standing out. It is about meeting people as he truly is, without carefully constructing a version of himself for their approval. He hopes that what people notice first is simply him.

That sense of authenticity becomes easier when he is around people who share his energy and personality. With the right people, there is less need to think about how he appears and more freedom to simply exist.

Perhaps that is why solitude matters to him, too.

There is something about a quiet Sunday morning, when there is nowhere to be and no one asking anything of you, that feels like freedom. Ardan enjoys taking walks alone, finding an open park, putting on some music, and letting the world become quieter for a while. Away from work, expectations, and the noise of everyday life, he finds room to hear himself again.

A garden Ardan used to walk

He even talks to himself.

Not only when he is alone, but sometimes even when surrounded by other people. It is his own small way of staying connected to the person underneath everything else.

A Scent That Feels Like Home

For Ardan, home has a scent.

Tuberose.

It might sound like a simple answer, but behind it is a very particular memory: Eid Mubarak eve, the living room at home, and his mother placing tuberoses in a vase.

The flower became more than a scent. It became a timestamp.

Years later, its fragrance can bring him back to that exact feeling—the familiarity of home, the presence of family, and a moment that once felt ordinary but has stayed with him. Over the time, he also grows fond of purple floral like iris as well. A powdery floral scent that enchanted anyone who smells it. Maybe that is what scent does best. It doesn't always remind us of a story. Sometimes, it brings back the feeling before we even have the words for it.

Purple flowers and tuberose are two of his favorite flowers

The Beauty of Being Heard

Ardan describes his ideal safe space simply: a quiet Sunday morning with no one around.

But if that space were a person, he would want someone who knows how to listen.

It feels fitting. Ardan talks a lot, he says. And perhaps what makes a connection meaningful isn't always having something profound to say, but knowing that there is someone willing to stay and listen.

That idea of connection has become increasingly meaningful to him.

In a world where relationships are often defined by romance, status, or what we can gain from one another, Ardan finds beauty in connections that ask for nothing in return. A friendship. A conversation. Someone who simply makes your day a little lighter.

To him, these relationships may seem ordinary—but there is something quietly beautiful about them.

"People often don't pay attention to a connection—a relationship between one person and another without any romantic purpose. I think it's a very ordinary thing, but on the other hand, it's really pretty and meaningful."

Ardan and his fragrance community friends in Jakarta

 

The People Who Keep Us Growing

One person who embodies this for Ardan is a friend he deeply admires: someone who knows many things, has a wide circle of connections, yet remains humble, kind, and positive toward everyone she meets.

Her ability to carry knowledge and influence without losing her warmth reminds him of the kind of person he wants to be.

Another influence comes from somewhere different: his coach.

At first, his coach may seem difficult or rough around the edges. But underneath that exterior, Ardan discovered someone caring and funny—someone whose character revealed itself beyond first impressions.

Perhaps both relationships taught him something similar: there is always more beneath what we first see.

 

Current Chapter: Strengthening Roots

Today, Ardan describes himself as being in a phase of strengthening his roots.

He isn't rushing toward the next version of himself. Instead, he is looking deeper—searching for the water beneath the soil, going through the stones, building something strong enough to support whatever comes next.

There is patience in that image.

Before a tree grows higher, it has to grow deeper.

And perhaps authenticity works the same way. Before we can fully become who we are, we have to understand what grounds us—what we carry from home, who we allow close, what we believe in, and what remains true when no one is watching.

Ardan is still becoming.

Still putting down roots.

And when the time comes, perhaps he will grow exactly where he is meant to.

 

Along the Way is a conversation series by Bentala that celebrates every person we cross paths with on this journey of life. Through honest and meaningful dialogues, we explore the memories, values, and quiet moments that subtly shape who we are today. Because inspiration doesn't always come from extraordinary lives. Sometimes, it comes from people simply learning to live more truthfully, one step at a time.